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Tony’s anecdotes from Guitar
World, August 1992
Ozzy's got to go! In an elevator?!
[chuckles] "Wait, here's one. Actually it's quite funny. We were all in an
elevator in this real plush hotel, and Ozzy decides to take a crap. As he's
doing it, the elevator is going down to the reception floor. The door opens
suddenly - and there's Ozzy with his pants around his knees. And all these
people in fur coats are just staring at him with their mouths open." [uproarious
laughter all around]
"Can I set you on fire, Bill?"
"I used to do terrible things to him. I actually set him on fire once - honest
to God. We were recording Heaven and Hell, and I asked, 'Can I set you on fire,
Bill?' And he said, 'Well, not now, not now.' So I said, 'Okay,' and then forgot
all about it.
An hour later Bill said, 'Well, I'm going home now. Do you still want to burn
me, or what?' I said, 'Sure.' So I got this bottle of petrol, tipped it on Bill,
set fire to him and - voomph. I couldn't believe it! He went up like a Christmas
tree. Well, he knew I was going to burn him, but he didn't know to what extent.
He screamed and started rolling around on the floor. His clothes started burning
and his socks melted - the nylon socks stuck to his leg. I wasn't able to help
him because I couldn't stop laughing.
Ride the Lightning
James Hetfield asks Tony, "Did you ever have to cancel any gigs because of
protesters?"
"Well, the Church stopped a few gigs from happening. One case was quite funny, I
thought. A church ran a thing in the papers for weeks before a scheduled
performance saying, if you let these lads into town you're committing a sin.
Anyway, they managed to stop us from playing. And the next day the church, for
some reason, burned down. [laughs] And guess who got the blame? The uproar was
ridiculous!"
Happy Birthday Satan!?!
"One night, after finishing a show, we returned to the hotel and found the
corridor leading to our rooms completely filled with people wearing black
cloaks, sitting on the floor with candles in their hands, chanting, 'Ahhhh.' So
we climbed over them to get to our rooms, but could still hear them chanting. We
called security, but that didn't work. So we synchronized our watches, opened
our doors at the same time, blew the candles out and sang "Happy Birthday" to
them. Pissed 'em off. They freaked - they were expecting us to help them conduct
a Satanic mass and they got 'Happy Birthday' instead."
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